When it’s time to tell your children about your divorce, tell them all at the same time

| Dec 15, 2020 | Divorce |

You and your spouse have been on the verge of divorce for some time now. You finally sat down and admitted that both of you would be happier if you ended the marriage. The conversation went far better than you ever dreamed it would, and you’re very happy about that. 

However, you still have to tell your children. You’re worried about how that talk will go, and you’re trying to decide how best to do it. If there’s one thing you should absolutely adhere to, it’s the fact that you should tell them all at once. 

Why does it matter whether you tell the kids all at once?

You want to tell the children all at once so that they hear the news from you. You do not want an older child to break the news to a younger one, for instance, because that can be very upsetting for them. When you control the timing of your announcement, you can control the message you’re sending. You also don’t put any of your children in a position where they feel like they’re keeping secrets from their siblings. That’s why the family meeting is the best setting for your announcement.

If your children are of different ages, you can keep that meeting brief and to the point. You’re just letting them know. You can then talk to them individually to have more in-depth conversations. Your 14-year-old daughter is going to have very different questions than your five-year-old son. But you still want to start with one single conversation to make this go smoothly. 

It helps to get as much information as possible before your announcement

With multiple children, you may be in for a complicated and possibly contested divorce case. It’s crucial for you to learn as much as you can about your legal rights. Talk to an experienced advocate about your situation before you start making announcements.